Diwali with lords

contemporary conversation between lords in diwali of 2013...

Rama: hey Lakshman, why didn’t you get reservation earlier..Travelling this way is such a mess..Exile was much soothing.

Lakshman: Brother. Don’t bother. You have killed Ravana not Osama..Please don’t act Obama…travel like an ordinary man. Getting reservations in these days is next to mission impossible.

Sita: both of you listen. No matter how we reach, make sure this diwali I get designer sari and handsome gold..

Rama: sari ,I would get you this time from Leela Bazaar .best sari shop down the town..I read on fb, this time they are giving 50% off on saris.

Sita: what about offers on Klipkart and Fabong.com??

Rama: please we are buying saris...I didnot check them yet. For gold you have to wait till Shoban Sarkar’s dream gets dug.

Sita: check out what are the preparations at Ayodhaya. Did they get new interiors??Has Ayodhaya became a metropolitan city yet.

Lakshman: it has become metro political city..People win election in lord’s name.

Rama: they just informed that they are buying new carrr.

Lakshman: bhaiya did you check Bharat’s status??

Rama: no what it says?

Lakshman: it reads

Fire! Cracker! Gifts!

 Lord Rama returns!!

#diwalihomecoming.

Sita: I thought they would state your bravery tales and my sordid saga. But I’m sure they might be going bad mouth about me, because I stayed at other man’s place. Patriarchy….

Lakshman: ok lets buy some sweets. from the shop. There is  so much rush. Bhaiya because of your homecoming people got diabetic, their lung exhale O2 and inhale Co2.

Rama: so you want me to go back to Lanka and change my plan of homecoming??

Because of me people get insane…

What a loss

Victory of truth over evil in vain.

Sita: don’t go philosophical..Think about me, after diwali gets over I would have to give ----Agnipariksha to tell people my character is safe and I m still pure...Dear don’t you think even you should give Agnipariksha. Even you stayed alone for 14 years. That too in wild. How they could set you free and not doubt your character???

Rama: ok baby I would definitely ‘think’ about it.

Lakshman: “think” lol..

Let’s buy some gifts this time, before it gets late.

Sita: Indian culture it’s all about formalities. In name of culture people burn their pockets.

Rich gets richer and poor, poorer .old parents surviving on pension have to send expensive gifts and clothes to their daughter’s in laws. Dowry seems to have become a recurring deposit, every now and then you have to keep depositing something so that your daughter survives dowry harassment or even death.

Lakshman: you are right, middle class has gone Hippocratic. They shout for inflation. But spend like anything on festivals to show off. They under pay their maid, workers…bullshit.

Sita: In name of god, even rape and murder are justified.

Rama: oho..I think our homecoming does more harm than good. Should we go back to Lanka..Here is pollution, Diabetic people and also it would save me from giving Agnipariksha..I’m afraid of it.

Lakshman: bhaiya you are not brave. A man can win any test. But always fails a woman’s test. A man can never match woman’s patience and perseverance.

Rama: O feminist...I would definitely give Agnipariksha  if you would accompany me .you see even you have stayed away from you wife Urmila for 14 years, as Sita says “that too in wild”. One should practice what one preaches...isn’t??

Lakshman: so what I was saying? Are we going back to Lanka?

Sita: Men will be men.